It's a Bird! It's a Plane! It's...Glenn Beck!

I strayed into the Dark Side last night and this morning reading the articles and blogs that spilled from the shaking fingers of shit-scared libs reporting on Becks' rally yesterday.  I - almost - feel a bit sorry for them.  Really - you can smell the rank, damp desperation pouring out of them.

Tee-Fuckin'-Hee...

I can't see what they can find to complain about in regards to Becks' speech.  From what I heard, Beck just wants us to stop acting like greedy, self-involved, intolerant assholes; remember who we truly are, and where we came from; and strive to rise above our own flawed natures to become something fierce and bright.

But...I guess them be those "fightin' words" I hear tell about to them there Democrats...  (BTW, all of us racist, Islama/homophobic, kitten-stomping conservatives are gap-toothed, Klan-loving, warmongers whose poor English is always heavily Southern-accented.  Oh, and we drool, too.  We are the droolingest sons'a'bitches you ever did see...)

I, for one, am grateful that I have some small sense of spiritual assistance.  That, and a healthy fear of ending up in prison having Flirty Gertie carving her name into my rump keeps me from being the nasty, venom-spitting, little Death Badger of Mayhem I am in my blackest heart of hearts.  It's God (Gertie and my proctologist) who keep me humble, remind me that - without guidance - what a little toad I am, and it's that helping hand from a God who watches over fools and drunks (and domesticated - kinda - Death Badgers) that keeps me from drinking a gallon of gasoline and inhaling a match.

Becks' speech asked two simple questions:  Can you be a better person?  Will you try?

I'm sure we can.  I'm much less certain that we care enough to try.

....so there....

I gave this rant (different words, same sermon) while I was helping out in the kitchen at M.H.  I got to the end (or ran out of breath?) and I realized it was one of those moments when the entire room is still and everyone is looking at you as if you had just taken a crap on the floor.  Sandy, a large, golden woman, was standing next to me and she said, "Good Lord - I don't think you've ever spoken more than ten words the whole time I've known you!" and Chad, one of the regular cooks, spoke into a silver ladel and said, "And that was DuhVeeDuh coming at you live from the soup kitchen we all know and love.  Next up - Sandy W. will sing 'God Bless America' while playing the accordian with her knees!"

I don't know.  Mebbe its a sign I'm coming back...  Yeah, but I've been there before, and I'm not sure it's what I want to return to anyway....